3 Comments

Your last couple paragraphs are incredibly interesting. I’m thinking.

Off the top of my head, I think “rape culture” Is thrown around inappropriately the way many social justice catchphrases are. They’re rooted in something real (actual violent sex offenders) but overextended dramatically and nonsensically (your sexist boss is not doing “rape culture.” Men being sexually pushy on dates—not assaulting, but falling short of the content affirmative consent idea—is not “rape culture”). I think women/activists who do not accept that distinction are doing themselves an injustice (you’re not that weak and helpless) and doing an injustice to the victims of actual sexual assaults (they’ve been victimized in life changing ways).

As to your one particular client, I imagine his daily life would be different if he came from a family with resources. But I agree, I don’t think he’d be any more accepted back into society even if he didn’t have to charge his ankle monitor in hotel lobbies. I think that’s appropriate. I hope people like him can find meaningful human connection, but no matter how long ago the crime was, one of that level has shattered social trust forever.

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Rape culture is a culture that privileges the perpetrator (usually a cis man) and thus disadvantages the victim (usually a cis woman). There are various parts to it and ways that it is sustained, such as victim-blaming and excusing sexual assault as a result of masculine biological proclivities (which of course puts the responsibility of not being victimized upon the potential victim; essentially preemptive victim blaming).

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